AirMaria. I find it very disturbing when the Lord’s name is used in vain, but there is the common use of another word that I also find disturbing. The use of this word has become so common that people that would never use the Lord’s name in vain think nothing of repeatedly using it. I can only assume that they are ignorant of, or have forgotten, the true meaning of this word in the context they are using it in.
When I was in grade nine, I became a very big Ozzy Osbourne fan. One day, a girl that I respect very much because of her moral beliefs (never think that your morality doesn’t have an effect on others) said to me, “Ozzy Osbourne sucks!” I was dumb stuck in shock. Not because she disapproved of Ozzy (an opinion I respected), but because she said that he “sucks.”
What does the term suck mean in this context? This is vulgar slang for performing fellatio. I can only assume that the girl I mentioned above had no idea of the origins of the slang usage of this word.
There is one positive thing to learn from this use of this term: fellatio is something that is bad. In fact, it is a moral evil. Not just between men, but also between a man and a woman, even in a marriage. Some suggest that this was the “original sin” of Adam and Eve. Some even suggest that Michelangelo alluded to this in the fresco The Fall and Expulsion of Adam and Eve in the Sistine Chapel.
There are many Catholics, including some that teach many good things about human sexuality, that accept fellatio within a marriage as acceptable, at least when the act is not completed but interrupted with the conjugal act. Such opinions are not based on the moral tradition of the Church but a concession to the growing immorality beginning in the last half of the 20th century.
An easy way to ascertain the morality of uncompleted fellatio within marriage is to contemplate the difference between the mortal sin of completed fellatio and the supposed “loving” and “moral” act of uncompleted fellatio. Could a slight misjudgement of timing, possibly less than a second, turn an act of love into a mortal sin that will prevent one from receiving Communion? Additionally, is there a stronger urge to complete the act or to discontinue it to preform a different act?
Men may be surprised to learn that many women not only want to discontinue the act, but avoid it altogether. This isn’t a topic that I generally discuss with women, but the women that I have discussed it with all find the very idea of fellatio revolting. This includes those that felt compelled to perform the act. One young lady, who, by the way, was not a Christian, came up with the perfect excuse not to preform fellatio ever again. She simply says, “I’m a vegetarian.”
Of course, the most obvious argument against a supposed moral good from fellatio is the obvious negative connotation of the phrase, “This sucks!” Does this phrase refer to a loving act? Never. It always refers to a morally evil act. However, should one be referring so casually and so frequently to common objects, persons and occurrences as being a morally evil and disordered sexual act?
Sexually explicit and offensive language should not become common place, but, sadly, it has. Like using the Lord’s name in vain, one should avoid it, both in speech and in listening environment. This may mean a change in how you select movies and music. It may even force you to politely and respectfully challenge those that do speak this way. I’m finally doing something about it by explicitly explaining what is meant when someone says, “This sucks!”
I would like to thank Dr. Alice von Hildebrand for affirming my convictions on this subject, especially in recent years. I would also like to thank her for inspiring me to write about these convictions by her example of proclaiming the truth however unpopular; it just took me a couple of years to get up the courage to write about it.
For those of you that do not know who Alice von Hildebrand is, she is a great Catholic philosopher and teacher. She is also the widow of the great Catholic thinker Dr. Dietrich von Hildebrand whom Pope Pius XII referred to as “the 20th Century Doctor of the Church.” He was a major influence on Bl. Pope John Paul II’s philosophical and theological thought, particularly in the area of human sexuality, and once remarked to Alice von Hildebrand, “Your husband is one of the great ethicists of the twentieth century.” Pope Benedict XVI has stated, “I am personally convinced that, when, at some time in the future, the intellectual history of the Catholic Church in the twentieth century is written, the name Dietrich von Hildebrand will be most prominent among the figures of our time.”
I would also like to point out that like myself, Dawn Eden, Scott Hahn, and even St. Augustine, Dietrich Von Hildebrand is a convert to the Catholic Faith.